A few years after I became a driver, I realized that if I used a simple trick -- a silly trick, really -- to explain away the exasperating actions of other drivers, I could keep my cool behind the wheel. When a driver ahead of me creeps along at 3 miles below the limit, or especially when that overcautious motorist takes fo-r-e-vvv-er to complete a turn, I say to myself, "He probably has a fresh pie on the seat next to him." This generates some empathy in my mind, and at least always gets a chuckle from my passengers.

This is really an apt summary of Sommers's book. He encourages us to look past what we see on the surface of interactions, and to practice this as we would strengthen a muscle -- to develop empathy, creativity, and a truer glimpse of the whole startling world beyond our own small experience of life. ( )

Has a very interesting chapter citing research about the chicken and egg question "are gender differences a result of genetics or culture?"

We all act a little differently in different situations, right? Sure, but this book is about so much more than that! There are so many things in our lives, from who we love to how well we do on math tests, that have to do with context. This book is a real eye-opener.

We have a false confidence in our ability to predict the behavior of others. It is easier, as the author says, to see others as "what you see is what you get," than to actually consider the context of the other person. We like to see the world as a stable place, even if that means someone going to jail because "people like that" are always guilty. When we're preoccupied, we're even less likely to notice situational influences on others. The next time someone makes you angry, stop to think about the circumstances they are/could be facing, their background, culture, affiliations, etc. and how that effects their behavior.

Other things I learned:

-The self is flexible - we should focus more on effort than aptitude.
-We see ourselves with rose-colored glasses, and that is okay because otherwise we'd be miserable and wallowing in self-doubt. The people most content with their lives have unrealistically high opinions of themselves.
-You look at people in your in-groups with the same rose-colored glasses you use for yourself.
-The strongest influence on whether you'll stop to help someone: if you're in a rush.
-People are more helpful when they're happy.
-If you're in need of assistance, call people out individually and tell them how to help.
-If someone else is in need of assistance in a crowd, never assume that someone else will take care of it
-How we feel about ourselves varies with location, mood, time of day, etc.
-Who we love - and hate - is based on proximity. ( )

The power of context is made very apparent by this book. Each chapter deals with situations where the context shapes or controls the way you react to a situation. Whether it's diffusion of crowds (where a whole set of people can hear something going on, and everyone assumes "someone else" will do it, or the power of presumed authority figures, it covers the territory fairly well.

It captured my interest, and was timely in helping me understand the psychological implications of a marketing project I was consulting on. It also has a comprehensive bibliography.

Recommended. ( )

I really enjoyed this book. The author's sense of humor made some of the potentially dry topics interesting. How crowd behavior can cause us to behave in ways we would never believe is fascinating. I must admit I enjoyed the first half of the book more than the second half as I felt the author got too serious in the later chapters and I felt like I was being preached to instead of the bright writing style in the first half of the book. Well worth reading though. ( )