Zinnie adores her older brother Gabriel. When he crashes someone else's car and ends up in a mental health treatment facility for bipolar disorder, her family really struggles. She finds herself frequently tending to the needs of her baby brother. She finds solace in her biology project and later in the lunch group run by the school social worker.
A strong character, Zinnie finds a way to talk about her feelings, deal with her mom's advice to keep things private, and heal herself and her relationships.
Barbara Dee is know for tackling tough topics for middle school audiences, and she does so again here. ( )

Four and a half stars from me.

The more I read of Barbara Dee’s Middle Grade books, the bigger fan I become of her writing. Dee’s new book My Life In The Fish Tank offers an approachable, empathetic, and realistic take on the topic of mental health. She does this with an engaging plot, relatable characters, and humor that will engage Middle Grade readers.

Our main character Zinny’s life is turned upside down when her older brother Gabriel is diagnosed with bi-polar disorder. How her family deals with the situation surrounding the diagnosis is a big part of the plot. And how they deal with it? Not well, unfortunately. Through this chaos Dee manages to keenly reflect the tween perspective, the complexities of family – and in particular, family loyalty.

Mom is distracted, Dad is in hiding, and they both don’t want Gabriel’s diagnosis to get out. This makes Zinny pull away from her friends who just want to help. The book captures the loneliness that can result from keeping secrets. I think it also does a great job at normalizing different situations that tweens might stigmatize, such as speaking with a counselor or attending the lunchtime counseling group. Overall, it takes a healthy approach to discussing mental health.

“Because one thing you notice, when those bad things happen, is that calendars and clocks stop making any sense. Even if they still work perfectly okay, even if the batteries are good, and the cords are still plugged in…they don’t communicate anything useful. Or even anything your brain can understand.
At least that’s how it seemed in our house.
It was like, after it happened, we were in a different time zone from everyone else.
A parallel universe.
And we needed some kind of new, not-yet-invented time measurement. Abnormal Standard Time.”

As expected, Dee captures the middle school voice perfectly. Zinny’s is funny, honest, and drew me right into the story. I thought her siblings (and her relationship with them) was well developed and relatable, too. She also has a great teacher who subtly helps her navigate the situation. (I love seeing strong teacher role models in books.) The book is age-appropriate for the subject matter and while geared for MG readers, it is wonderful for all ages.

I received a copy of the book for review purposes. All opinions are my own! ( )

Zinnia is pretty happy with her life. She's got a warm, loving family, including her older brother and sister, Gabriel and Scarlett, and her little brother Aiden. She has two good friends, she's got a great science teacher and is looking forward to 7th grade.
Then her parents get an early morning call about her brother, away at college. He's been in a car accident. But it's something much worse and even though they won't tell any of the other kids what's going on, they know that something is wrong. Finally, they find out that Gabriel is bipolar. He's not coming home to recuperate because he's going to live in a residential facility and their parents want them to keep the news "private."

Zinnia's not sure she could have talked to her friends about it anyways; she's all mixed up inside and feels like everyone is watching her all the time. Scarlett won't talk to her and has mostly kicked her out of her room, their mom is on the phone with insurance people all the time, and their dad spends most of his time at work. Her refusal to talk about what's going on and her own increasing worry and struggles alienate her friends. Her only refuge is Ms. Molina's biology class and their experiments on crayfish.

Luckily, Zinnia is not alone. With the help of friends, teachers, and her family slowly learning to work together through difficulties, she begins to adjust to their situation, speak up for herself and her younger brother Aiden, and figure out who her friends really are - and make some new ones along the way.

From an adult perspective, it's easy to see that Zinnia's family has never faced any major situations before. They have no financial or health worries, although there are hints at Gabriel's mental illness before his breakdown. They've never really had their resilience tested and it's not surprising that they don't respond well at the beginning. I've seen many families where, in a crisis, the "quiet" kids who seem to be doing ok are left behind while the parents deal with the most obvious problems. Zinnia, like her family, has no social-emotional tools to deal with a difficult situation.

The story touches lightly on the stigma of mental illness as well as showing the resources that Zinnia eventually finds. Readers can relate to Zinnia's outward frustration with her friends' chatter about crushes and school gossip when her own worries seem overwhelming, as well as the feeling that everyone knows her family's problems and is talking about them. In a realistic, and upbeat ending, Zinnia reclaims one of her pair of friends, her best friend from childhood, who was helping Zinnia behind the scenes even when she was pushed away, and makes new friends who understand what she's going through. All her problems aren't solved, but she's on the way to repair and make stronger the surface relationships with her family that have been tested.

Verdict: This is a well-written story of friendship, personal growth, and dealing with the bad times that come along that will appeal both to kids who have never weathered any storms and those that can relate to familial crisis. Recommended.

ISBN: 9781534432338; Published September 2020 by Aladdin; Galley provided by publisher for review; on my order list for the library